There’s a place I go to about 1,000 feet away (0.2 miles) where I feel relatively comfortable and my nerves don’t get the better of me. It is there that I teach art. I used to make epic trips to Hawaii and Asia, but nowadays I don’t venture out too much further than I have to. Back in 2016, sleep deprivation, low blood sugar, and brain fog caused me to quit my job as a product designer for a tech company. I’m sure there’s a doc out there that would love to hook me on benzos, but to be honest, I’ve been so happy staying at home, painting and teaching part–time, that I’m not sure that I would want to change anything about my life. If you’ve never had anxiety, it’s not really about worrying. At least my particular brand of it has more to do with being calm and in a good mood most of the time until something rattles me, or I make some ridiculous food choice that spikes my insulin and makes my blood sugar unstable for the rest of the day.
In a strange way, I’m thankful for being overly sensitive and a bit of a mess sometimes. I promise I’ll try to make good use of all the things that make me who I am. Perhaps my artwork can in a tiny way, bring comfort to an anxious world.
About the art:
I often find myself painting child samurais and onna-mushas (female warriors). These little knights and mushas represent a fragile part of ourselves that needs to be courageous in a great big beautiful and scary world. Conjuring up images of samurai, which served mostly during times of peace, also becomes for me a way of symbolizing inner strength and the willingness to participate on emotional and mental battlefields. It’s been said that our bodies are time machines. The heart, gut, or solar plexus is where our inner child resides (sometimes sounding alarms). I think it’s important to pay close attention to this younger version of ourselves where all our pain and creativity come from. Most of my paintings are acrylic on canvas, inspired by Chinese landscape paintings, Japanese woodblock prints, and anime.
I live in Sunrise, Florida (The other land of the rising sun) with my wife, Ching Yi (Jean), and my Maltese mix, Cosplay.
Email me if you’d like to discuss your superpowers, or anything else, especially Japan.
— Mr. C (Carlos Delgado Aleman)
